Monday, November 17, 2014

An Era of the Uncompulsed


I need to get busy on my blog.

I should pay a visit to my friends in the blogosphere.

I need to figure out what I'm going to blog about.

I wonder if I'll ever get back to blogging?

I wish I felt like blogging.

Can a blog collect dust or rust?

I miss my favorite bloggers.

... and on and on it goes.


It's been many weeks since I put in an appearance here.  Instead, I've been settling into rural America, raising a puppy (Maizie, who is now 5 1/2 months) and shifting yet another retirement gear.  Had anyone told me just five years ago that I would actually want to move at a snail's pace I'd have laughed. But now I snail on ...

Many were the years, especially as I raised children & worked full time that my life resembled that of a Circus Performer.  I was forever just one breath aware from implosion, balancing ten tiny tea cups on pencil-thin sticks while simultaneously juggling bowling balls.  I still can't believe I survived it.  Such were the days now long gone.

As I was driving the vast four miles between home and town the other day it occurred to me that I am completely free of compulsions or, to be exact, I'm uncompulsed.  My mind ruminates on the above thoughts and many others with nary a sense of urgency or guilt.  I sift & sort, looking for ways to make these days rich & sweet.  Such sifting often entails the baking of cookies, or a walk in the nearby orchards with said puppy, or a nap.  

My mother would be apoplexed (yes, I'm aware that isn't a real word, but it fits) at my choices.  In the world in which she grew up, as well as the one in which she raised we four girls, to move snail-like was synonymous with lazy.  She never left anything undone, Industrious was her middle name.  God forbid anyone should nap.  

I hardly feel lazy.  Thinking, sifting and sorting can be quite exhausting.  

There is much I hope to accomplish in the coming days, weeks and years.  I'm not done with the blogosphere or writing.  In fact, I hope to spend many, many hours penning a tribute to family.  I have many dreams and an equal number of projects ~ a goodly number of which may accompany me to the hereafter should I not get to them in the here and now.  I'm totally OK with the undone.

What's precious to me at this moment is the freedom to pace myself, to savor the moment, and to pack away those tea cups & bowling balls for good.

Amen.